Hmm, Paramore…paramour…anybody else make that connection?

I think that obviously we were all supposed to. Paramore: A cool band who’s main singer has flaming hair. Paramour: An illicit lover. But anybody, I stopped watching music videos a while ago because I can’t find anything half as cool as Linkin Park’s “In the end” music video with the flying metal whale. That was mockery by the way. But I really am disappointed with the whole music video industry. Every time I watch a music video with one of those million dollar budgets I get a little sick thinking “while children die of hunger and a lack of clean water we’re spending millions on three minute videos that have no real positive impact on the world.” So I stopped watching music videos. But the other day my friend Keit was telling me about the Crushcrushcrush music video and I was like “Crushcrushcrush? I love that song! Why is it written as one word? Who knows? But the song rocks, let us go watch the video on YouTube!” So I did. It was interesting. I felt ashamed for ever thinking Ms. Williams hair was natural. That must be some funky wig. I’m joking, but the color is definitely not real. It was funky. But another thing that makes me slightly sick is watching bands smash their instruments when our corps praise band could use them. And also the money it cost to buy those instruments could do so much in the right place. But I still liked the video overall. But then I decided to watch the video for their big hit “Misery Business” which has a line very close to my heart “Second chances, they don’t ever matter, people never change. Once a whore you’re nothing more, I’m sorry that’ll never change…” it’s cruel but I deeply understand the sentiment. But that’s beside the point. The video started and I was like “Whoa! ADD!!” it was all moving cameras and flashing colors at the beginning. Sure it was eye catching, but it hurt your head to look at. And then I didn’t really like the video. I can listen to the song and sort of block out it’s true meaning, but the music video makes very clear what a large portion of my experience, and some of my classical reading (Go Mr. Chaucer!), has taught me but I still hate to believe. All women are self centered brats to whom men are simply pawns in a game where the ultimate prize is complete superiority. And it doesn’t matter how many hearts (or necks) you have to break to get what you want, you’ll get it. Now I’ve figured out this isn’t true of all women. But I’m still searching through the millions of girls between the ages of 16 and 20 who inhabit Earth to find someone worthy but so far my search isn’t going well…Oh well, there’s always the future. I don’t know what I’d do if I meant a good girl anyway, besides what I already do with my friends who are girls. So it’s probably better for now if I avoid any heart or neck breaking situations until such a time as I find a girl who will only break my neck, because that can heal.

Anyway, because there a few non-demon spawn females out there I’m going out to the library today with my friends Anneli and Evelin. Who are female, in case you didn’t get that. At least I’m supposed to go to the library with them. I’m waiting for their phone call, and right now it’s alternating snowing and raining outside so we’re all going to be walking. So we’ll see. But I feel that right now I just need to make one little statement to clarify. I think my blog very often comes of very misogynistic when I don’t mean it to. And sometimes I do mean it to. But I just want to point out how lucky I’ve been with women my whole life. I’ve seen the good, the BAD, and the ugly. And I’ve had the wonderful blessing of having tons of girl friends. Not tons of girlfriends, but tons of friends who are girls. Depending on who you ask I’ve had two girlfriends, but Anneli would claim other. But no matter who you ask you will know that I am always spending time girls. And I think it’s been great for me. When I first moved to Estonia I was terrified of girls just as Martians fear Venetians, or whatever you call people from Venus. But through 3 years worth of have mostly girls for friends I’ve gotten much more used to women. And they don’t freak me out anymore. But I’ve also learned a lot. Girls aren’t all the Tennyo (Celestial maidens) that I once thought they are. Just like angels can fall, so can women. These pictures of human beauty and perfection rarely are. And I’ve learned that there are piles and piles of girls, I believe the majority of girls, who would break my, or anybody’s, heart and neck to get what they want. But thanks to the few good ones I know I’ve still kept faith that there is a Tennyo out there somewhere for me. But seeing as how Tennyo is Japanese, I doubt I’ll be finding one any time soon.

But that’s enough obsessing about girls. Those of you who are guys are saying “who are you to complain, you’re planning to go out today with not one, but two beautiful girls!” and those of you who are girls are either sharpening your pitch forks or trying to legally change your name to Tennyo. Mostly pitchforks though. Anyway, I smell bacon, and I’m starving, so I much go. Cya!!