Sunday, September 30, 2007

Chris is...ANGRY AT FACEBOOK!! (And he also his more thoughts on his job at MegaGame, and many other America)

Many of you “Facebookers” will recognize my mockery of the “Chris is” thing on And it’s true. Right now I am ANGRY at FaceBook. Why am I ANGRY? And why am I writing ANGRY all in caps? Is it because the A in ANGRY is right next to the caps lock on this laptop? NO! See, I can do caps there too. Well I’m writing ANGRY all in caps to stress how very, very, very ANGRY I am. And why am I ANGRY? Because FaceBook is not sexist…not racist…and as far as I can tell not nationalist like I usually am…FaceBook is…schoolist!! What does this mean you ask? It means that because I am a homeschooler, and therefore don’t “go” to school they first wouldn’t let me on FaceBook at all. Unless I lied about my age, and I didn’t want to do that because I wouldn’t want people thinking I’m really 50! But now that I have joined a school network of a school I’ve “been” too several times, and have been to classes at, therefore making it a school I’ve been too in Estonia in the last yearish time, they say they have to verify me in the school network. So I tracked down some of the girls I ate brownies with that day at the International School of Estonia (ISE, which ironically enough means “Self” in Estonian. As in “Selfish” I don’t like the international school, but I don’t believe I’ve ever blogged about it. Lucky for them…) and asked them to verify me, because I knew that it must have been love at first sight for one of us, and it wasn’t for me. Of course my old and new friend Regina (old and new in that I knew her once and now I know her again, making her both old and new) was willing to help but now despite her adding me as a friend on FaceBook, which is what the cursed website told me to do to have my account verified, I still have threatening message from FaceBook every time I sign in saying something like “take action now or your account will be disabled, you low life homeschooling scum!” something like that. So now I’m down to stalking other members of ISE who I don’t even know or giving up my FaceBook account. FaceBook is schoolist and it must stop. I’m not the first homeschooler to have this problem. If FaceBook didn’t allow women, or African-Americans, or Homosexuals, or any other group that is commonly discriminated against then they would totally be shut down or something. It’s offensive. It’s not right. Homeschoolers need to be allowed on FaceBook too. FaceBook is not school run website. It is open to the public, and therefore should be open to homeschoolers. In case you haven’t got the idea yet I’m ANGRY!!!

I’m used to schoolist attitudes by now, I’ve almost come to expect it. I’ve had people, upon hearing I’m homeschooled, ask if that meant I was stupid, or retarded, or had something wrong with me. And just in case you are stupid, or retarded, or have something wrong with YOU, then let me just point out that being homeschooled makes you no more stupid than anyone else. So now you have my outraged message of why I’m ANGRY at FaceBook. If you are on FaceBook, and would like to join my homeschooling crusade, please suggest “Homeschoolers” as a network, write suggestions to FaceBook saying things such as “Please make it easier for HomeSchooler to use your site.” And just let the FaceBook people know that we are ANGRY about their schoolist attitude towards HomeSchoolers. It’s wrong and we won’t stand for it. I hope you join me in my crusade against schoolism. And by the way, I’m also against racism, sexism, Nazism…any kind of “ism” I probably don’t like. So let’s fight those too.

Anyway, besides being angry, I’ve also been busy. Which is the best thing to do when angry, because work makes you feel better. The officers of the Estonia region of the Salvation Army got together in Loksa this weekend for “negotiations”. Which we believe was a mistranslation, because what really was happening was meetings about officer type things. And because of the fact that there was going to be as many officers kids (including me) as officers (8) there was a desperate need for babysitters. Because 5 of the kids were from Narva they brought one babysitter, and together me and Masha (a different Masha then the one anyone reading this would know) watched the 7 kids. It was fun, walking through the woods picking mushrooms…finding the most poisonous mushroom in Estonia and telling the kids not touch it…going to the beach and looking at dead jellyfish…All in all, very exciting. Anyway, the night we slept at camp I commandeered one of the single bed side rooms, usually reserved for camp leaders, as my own. It was great having my own room. I had my own heater too. So I turned the room into a sauna. But anyway, around midnight I was sleeping happily, dreaming about having a job at MegaGame, because it had been on my mind so much, I was awoken by a strange sound. A scratching sound…a nasty, horrible, in-the-wall sound. There was a rat or some rodent in the wall that was scratching in a most annoying fashion. And it’s not a very nice sound to wake up to. So as I rolled over and tried to stave off images of awakening with a rodent gnawing my ear I also did some thinking about the thing that was foremost in my mind, other than the rat off course. MegaGame. It had been a great dream. Happy customers, happy me, money, friends, fun…everything I could want. But I knew there was more thinking to be done. So I lay there and ran through going and asking about the job, and getting the job, and doing the job, and going to America for a month, and…going to America for a month! Hit the brakes! MegaGame might be unhappy if I come, ask for a job, have them say “excellent, a nerd! Just what we needed to fill the position! When can you start?” to have me say” I can start immediately…but I leave for a month on October 26th so…umm, can you go without me for a month?” They’d probably say “No! You’re barely even hired yet and I’m already firing you, you American punk! Now, because I’m no expert on discerning God’s will I’ve come to a simple conclusion, because God is both omniscient and omnipotent, if it is his will for me to have this job (as I sincerely hope it is) the position will still be open when I come back in November, and they will accept me.

We’ll see what happens in two months then. Anyway, I really do hope that I can get this job, because I really want it, and because working at MegaGame seems to be my last option for getting a job in Estonia. I had thought I might also get a job working at the Hilton international reservations place. Which would have been cool, because it would mean if you, in America, wanted to make a reservation at a Hilton anywhere in the world then you would call me and I would hook you up. And because people from around the world would be calling and speaking in English it would be perfect. I could talk to Australians, Americans, Brits, Canadians…am I forgetting anyone? But anyway, the place is closing, so now I have no option other than MegaGame. Meaning I really hope it works out. Or else I have no job. But if any of you out there reading this have need of a worker to fill almost any position (I say almost because I’d make a crappy porn star) then know that I am will and available. Please contact me at, or if you want to talk 56469016. Whatever. I just would really like a job.

Another thing I’ve been thinking about a little bit is that for the first time since…well almost since I moved to Estonia, I’ve felt tired of living in a foreign country. I’ve gotten sick of not being able to get a job because of my language abilities when in America I’d be over qualified. I’m getting tired of it all. It’s so very hard. And I am starting to want a break from it all. It’s funny how little of what I thought I’d miss out on I actually did. When I first moved from America I had many things I thought that by living in Estonia I’d miss out on. Having cool friends is one. For some reason, until I actually got here I assumed all Estonians must be freaks. I was very wrong about that. When I was a naïve 14 year old having a girlfriend was a big thing I was worried I’d miss out on. I thought that if I didn’t have any girlfriend when I was between the ages of 14 and 17 I’d die alone. Well I didn’t miss out on having girlfriends, or a girlfriend, depends on who you ask, though I wish I had. I missed out on very little. But it’s not what I feel I’m missing that bugs me. All I’m missing is crap TV, Reeses, and Root Beer. The only good thing I’m missing is cool music. But I can get a lot of that online. I would saying I’m missing big Christian youth events but you know what? Youth events don’t have to have 2000 youth to be great. 30 youth is better in many ways. So I’m not missing that. But I’m just tired of not be able to talk to the cute girl because she speaks Russian. And all I know how to say in Russian is ”hello, I want to sleep with a beautiful girl” and that’s not good to say if you don’t want to be slapped. I’m very much looking forward to this visit to America. And in a year, to college. To be where everyone speaks my language. Where I’m not the only one. That’s what I miss. But for now I’ll just enjoy where and what I am. You never know, maybe the college I go to will have a Christian card shop/video game store where I can work. Then I could have all three dreams in one. You never know…but until then, I need to go, this post has gotten far too long already. Cya!


Anonymous said...

I'm am also homeschooled. It irks me that Facebook won't allow me to join.

Anonymous said...

I feel you're anger!!