Saturday, February 10, 2007

The way of the ninja...or police and christian youth stuff, same thing really.

In the past two days i have had two interesting things to blog about, one yesterday and now one today. They are both about my way of the ninja, because i have decided that now i actually will become a ninja. It's much less painful than becoming a cyborg, because to become a cyborg i would need extensive surgery. So anyway, i bet you're wondering why i have such a funny picture up. Well i bet you also think i'm just about to tell you. Well i'm not, so be patient, read the whole post, and all will become clear...NINJA! Anyway, yesterday, friday, rather than having youth group at the corps like we normally do we decided to all go to some thing at some other church. I believe it was Lutheran, but i'm not sure. Anyway, when i say all of us went i mean four of us. Half the people who normally come to youth group weren't coming anyway, so instead it was just Eero, Vesse, Anneli, and me. The four of us formed a mighty squad of crazy salvationists. It was quite fun walking through old town joking around about the need for and elavator. But then we finally did make it to this place, after Eero (who we were following) led us a very round about way. It was quite freaky, the second we walked in they smacked red paper wrist bands on us. Right away Anneli started complaining about them being Soviets tagging us and all that evil junk. Anneli is so paranoid at times. Anyway, so us three guys and paranoid Anneli headed down the stairs to the coat room. this was the strangest set up for a coat room i had ever seen. I think they assumed that since this was a Christian even they didn't have to give us little tags to get our coats back and could just trust us to be honest and not steal coats. So we handed over our coats and then walked up stairs. Then Anneli complained some more about the fact that there were no chairs. I agreed with her, if they want me to stay for two hours they should at least be courteous enough to give me a chair. I right away started feeling nervous as i stood there in the crowd. I hate it when i'm in big crowds of people where everyone knows everyone...except me! So everyone is walking up to people and hugging friends, and chatting, and having fun, and me an Anneli just stood to one side, her complaining that she felt sick. Girls always say they feel sick. Part of the reason why neither one of us wanted to be there is we both hate cool people. No wait, let me correct that. We dislike, not hate, popular, not cool, people. I mean we are cool. I think so anyway. But just standing in that crowd of people where everybody knew everybody, and everyone was so cool, and i was just a no name bugged me. I did actually see two girls i knew. I always know girls. I always love it when i'm introduced to and older guy and he's like "Hi, my name is Mr...." and i say "Oh yeah, i've met your daughter." I always know girls.

So anyway, i'm moving away from my point. So then 15 minutes after this thing was supposed to start this guy came up and prayed and i thought "Good, prayer, good way to start anything" and it was a nice begining, until the band started playing. It was actually, it started with the room going dark and some words flashing across a screen while a lone violinist (I love the sound of violins!) played. And the words said something like "There will come a time to praise God...and that time is now!!" so that was cool, until the band started playing. I probably would have liked it better if it was quieter. I'm a fan of loud music, but this...OUCH! My ears felt like they'd start bleeding any second. The music was actually pretty good, except the singers, but you know the whole hurting ears thing kind of makes me not like something. But i'm a strong ninja, so i stood tall against the painful waves of sound and survived. Pretty soon after Anneli started complaining about the sound too, but she's an even stronger ninja than me so she stood strong against the onsluaght. But i did mention to her that if she wanted to turn tail and run i'd be right behind her. After forty minutes of having our brains smashed around the inside of our skulls by sound waves. She leaned over and said she was going to leave because she felt sick and had a deadly headache. I was quite happy to have the excuse of being a gentleman and having to leave to escort her to the bus stop.

But then we had to go down stairs to get our coats. NO!! THE HORROR!! I knew a lot of people had come after us but i didn't know there was that many! They had coats piled all over the room, the hooks being taken up by about 5 coats each. Because i despise normal winter coats i always wear fleeces, and because no one else is as crazy as me nobody else wore fleeces, so it was easy to track down my stuff. But Anneli wore a red coat, and apperantly red coats are in style or something because we searched and searched, and the coat room guys were helping us, and it took us like fifteen minutes to finally find hers. We found like a million other read coats, but it took forever to find hers. So then me and Anneli finally made it out alive, me immediately pulling out my pocket knife and sliceing through my wrist band, Anneli wasn't so patient, she tore hers off with her bare hands (I told you she's a stronger ninja than me). So then we enjoyed a nice walk through old town at night. We got to check out the ice sculptures, which was cool because one sculpture looked like some Yugioh cards standing up in the snow, so Anneli and I considered the fun idea of playing Yugioh in the snow with giant ice cards. We liked the idea. Then as we passed the ice skating place she told me of her hatred of skating. Then a few minutes later we did go ice skating. Not intentionally of course. We went skating on black ice near Viru Keskus, almost smacked our heads, but we have mad ninja skillz so we survived. Then she jumped on a bus and i jumped on a tram and we said adieu until tommorow, which is now today, and will soon be yesterday.

Now i will tell you the story of today. Anneli came over to babysit, which was quite fun because half the time i sat in my room and listenend to Anneli and Elizabeth discuss things from zombies to spanking. I was glad to inform them that zombies are easily taken care of with shotguns and spanking is something that makes me run and hide. All in all it was a fun time. Especially when Anneli made us hot dogs. YUM! It was nice to have a day off and watch some one besides me get attacked with a lightsaber. So then that night my parets took us all out for pizza as a reward for being so great and then the fun began. We ordered our pizza (YUM!) and then waited as it came out, but then this guy and his two buddies came in and started causing trouble. They were insulting the waitresses in Russian (Fat pig isn't a compliment in any language) banging things because of when you bang you get your pizza faster, and also messing with some girls who were sitting in a corner eating pizza. Now as soon as these jerks start messing around my ninja senses were alerted to the immediate danger. I moved my pocket knife into an easy grabbing position (i don't think i could hurt anyone with it but it sure looks scary) and leaned back to keep an eye on them. Now the two wonderfully self controlled young ladies behind the counter had of course pressed the silent alarm button and called Falck, and in just a few minutes to cool looking Falck guys all in black walked in. They were so cool! They asked the three guys to leave because they kept causing trouble, and after a little complaining and jerkiness two of them left, but the third felt cocky, he'd been the one who was banging things. The two Falck guys kept talking to him and asking him to leave and he just kept being a jerk and saying stuff like "I'm not moving, what you gonna do about?" so after a while they were forced to show him what they were gonna do about it. One of them went over to him and grabbed his sleeve and tried to get him up, that's when the guy freaked out and started hitting and flailing around. Now let's think about this, two Falck guys with guns and hand cuffs ask you to leave. What idiot hits them! So in about three seconds he was on the floor as one Falck guy put his knee into his back and held him down while the other put the handcuffs on him.

I've gotta say if this was an evil empire captureing a brave hero it would have been a heroic battle. But it was police trying to question a man who had been asaulting women and two security guards. When the police came and the they took the hand cuffs off him rather then calming down and trying to reduce the amount of trouble he'd get himself into he started kicking the Falck guys! Idiot! Thats called asking to get arrested. So he did. It was quite sad actually. He wasn't that drunk though so i don't know how some guys can think they're so great. But i have a thoery from my great ninja teacher, Jiraiya, the frog hermit! He's the white haired guy in the picture fighting with a twelve year old. Once he gave his twelve year old student some advice: "There are three things you must avoid, because these three things will make a ninja go bad. Gambling, alchohol, and women!" And i noticed here we had alchohol, the guy was drinking beer and though he may not have been horribly drunk he was still acting pretty stupid. Women, who were these guys messing with? The young ladies trying to enjoy their pizza and the young women trying to serve the pizza. And finally, gambling, what kind of gambling odds are those? Two armed security guards against a hot headed punk? Dumb gamble. So i have now figured out these three things really do make ninjas go bad. Only he wasn't a ninja, only i am a ninja! So i will avoid alchohol and gambling at all costs...and women to some extent. Hehe, but for now i am done blogging and must fly, my bed and dreams await me, good night!

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