Friday, November 03, 2006

Welcome to the ultimate blog reading experience from the one and only Christopher John Clark, King of his own little universe!!

Hello to all my loyal fans! Thank you! Thank you! You're too kind! All one of you! Despite the fact that i know it's not true i am going to keep pretending that i think that only one person reads my blog. Girl with a crush on me, your blind loyalty in reading such slipshod writing as mine can only be called stupid to the extreme. And for that i most sincerely thank you. And laugh at you. But mostly thank you. I'm sure i probably love you too. By the way, that reminds me. Please do not comment on my blog without leaveing some kind of name! And it doesn't have to be your real name, just something i will recognize! People do it all the time! BSS, Gato, Kin...I know all these people, just leave a nickname or something but don't leave me hanging, dying in my curiousity to know WHO THE HECK ARE YOU!?!?! So yeah, just wanted to throw that out because i've been getting way too many anonymous comments lately. Anyway back to my suspicions that somewhere out there, one of you is madly in love with me. no, not you. i already know you love me. that other chick. the russian one. when i first started this beautiful thing we call the Chronicles of Chris someone commented on my blog in russian and i have never found out who it was. but through my vast knowledge of people who speak russian i have had it translated many ways and know that this chick loves me. sad part is i don't know who she is! I'd like to imagine her with flowing straight black hair and a walk like an angel...but that's just as likely as me running around in circles all day, which now that i think about it rather likely...

Anyway, i'm getting off topic as always. what was the topic you ask? i don't know. how about i make one up. oh i know. i'll tell you about my THIRD blog. http://chrischroniclesofschool.blogspot.com/ is the new blog reading experience from the great mind of yours truly (i'm far too modest, right?) this year for school i was supposed to have a diary for schoolwork and i was just like "Diary? Blog? BLOG IT UP BABY!!" so now i have an evil school blog for my school work. fun huh? it will probably bore you to death once i actually start posting anything and it will probably be more of a dead end like my other blog (http://progamer4christ.blogspot.com/) which never really took off...or more took off then crash landed. so yeah, stick with Chris Chronicles, where we really know how to partay! (This is DJ Kuri-Suu (fierce mouth) here to rock the house!) Anyway, now that i'm done telling you bout my blogs evil twin i must tell you about todays evil twin...yesterday!

Yesterday, unshowered and unshaven, i was going through the motions of school work, corps work, family work, adn other such aspects of life when i was rudely interrupted by a call from a number that hadn't called me in a long time..."Chris? Can you meet me at the corps in five minutes? I'm almost there!" Umm, RUN! So still unswhered and unshaven i bolted to the corps in the freezing icy snowy cold, which was made extra fun because i had forgot how to walk on ice and almost slipped about a hundred times. and i noticed something fun about music and the whether. when the little man inside my MP3 player played Blink 182's "I miss you" the ice didn't feel so cold, especially when i sang along..."Don't waste your time on me your already a voice inside my head..." and when the little MP3 man played NightWish's "Ghost Love Score" (gotta love them Finns) i felt like the tenth member of the Fellowship of the Ring ("Kurisu") Climbing up the Mountains of Moria which made my short walk to the tram feel like an adventure. which of course it always is with me...

So anyway after Climbing the Mountains of Moria and jumping on a tram i got to the corps and pulled Liis's hair to say hi. by the way, it was Liis who had called. Liis my old friend from Tartu who i hadn't seen in a while. so me and Liis sat down and chatted while her phone charged then we took off to Viru Keskus to go sweater shopping. and of course 2 hours and a million stores later we did find a sweater that both me and her liked (She liked it because it was purple, like a bush ;-) I liked it because it didn't show cleavage, always a bonus when shopping with girls. you can tell them not to buy revealing clothes) and then after walking around, buying chocolate and Dr. Pepper (Viru Keskus is like the only place in Estonia where you can buy Dr. Pepper) and waiting forever we met up with Anneli and walked over to Kristiine Keskus and had fun looking at teddy bears, laptops, and suitcases. oh yes, the excitement, a pink suitcase(dripping sarcasm on my shirt again...). it was quite fun until we had to say our goodbyes to Liis as she went home with her uncle and me and Anneli headed home. it was especially sad splitting up with Anneli in BaltiJaam, to say goodbye to two beautiful girls in one night...tragic. well at least i'll some some more tonight! Youth Night Rulez!

So it was all very exciting and informative. i always learning something new about the opposite sex when i spend large chucks of time with them. like i kind of had it explained to me why girls like "bad boys" but it still doesn't make sense. and i also don't get how drunk british guys are funnier than me. i mean they have to get drunk to be funny. i'm hilarious and crazy when i'm sober, saves money on drink. some things i'll never understand. explain to me again why girls want the excitement of a drunk "bad boy" who will "love" them, leave them and never really need them, over the fun and real love of someone who genuinely cares about them, and wants to take care of them and likes them for more reasons then the two reasons most guys like girls for (right breast and left breast). i will never ever understand...

so anyway, off that subject that makes me want to punch old town tourists. in March (i think) some of the Tallinn corps youth and i are headed to England for three days of pure party action. well more like performing dances, dramas and whatever else they make us do. i'm quite excited about it because i love traveling with my friends. anywaythis gives me an opportunity to blog about something i've wanted to talk about for a long time. aiport toilets. whats with airport toilets? i mean you walk in and after wiping the, err, condensation off the seat (oh, it's condensation. i thought it was...) you seat down and you read all the beautiful graffiti. "Bob was here" "I sniff farts" "America sucks" "Weed rulz" "What the ****?" "Why do so many people write on bathroom walls?" i've read it all. Anyway, so after reading the Graffiti you start to wonder about one of the airport's greatest mysterys...why do they sell condoms in the airport bathrooms? you can't have sex on a plane! not that i know of anyway. so why on earth do they sell condoms in ariport bathrooms? i could speculate more but when it comes to sex letting my mind wander is never a safe thing to do so i'll stick with what i've written so far. anyway. so that's my review of the men's rooms in almost every airport i've ever been to. i wonder if the women's rooms are that strange...i mean do they sell condoms in the women's room too? or...i'm gonna change the subject.

a few more things i feel and urge to write about. when i was in the Bastion store in Viru Keskus (where Liis got her sweater) i saw this wicked cool guy's shirt that was just so cool. it said "attacker's squad" on it and it looked quite warm and comfy so i went to look at the price and i choked on my tongue when i found out that it was more than 500 kroon. dude, i wish i were rich. i would look so cool. oh wait, i already loook cool! never mind that then. i just don't know where people get 500 kroon to spend on one shirt. and another thing i feel compelled to say. why do women have whole stores devoted simply to their underwear? are they obbsessed or what? i mean guys don't have whole stores devoted to underwear that i know about. but in Viru Keskus alone there are at least 3 women's underwear stores. i don't understand it. what is the obsession ladies? i mean not many people see it. it's not like shirts and pants. maybe it's a comfort thing...or maybe chicks stare at themselves naked in the mirror a lot...i dunno. whatever. again too wierd of a subject.

Now i need to go. i will Cya you all some other time. sorry to give you such a long post. i just love my blog. anyway, Cya!

2 comments:

Erica said...

Hi Chris,

it was quite interesting to read your long novel. Hehe so far as I know no condoms in ladies' bathrooms in airports. And yeah dunno why there are so many underwear shops for women...

anyhow I miss you and others

take care and God Bless


Erica

Anonymous said...

Sorry about being anonymous, i have lost my ability to understand about how to log in...
If you think that having sex on a plane is impossible, think about the "mile-high club". It means people who go to the airplane toilet and have sex there, mostly with total strangers. A toilet on a plane is usually a quite ugly place and definitely not the ultimative place for romance, but there are more weird, acrobatic people around than we can believe. And of course, there are always people who meet the very first time on a plane and right after landing decide to take a hotel room together. So they need to have condoms with them. None of it is a good idea, but the world is as it is...

Take care,
Reet (the "old granny" from Kolgata)